Wednesday, June 24, 2009

I Spy with my little eye a very bored audience

Another pos from the L.A. Library shelves.

I Spy (2002)

Do you like Eddie Murphy's Donkey in the Shrek movies? His non-stop chatter is kind of funny. Would you like to listen to 97 minutes of extremely dull Donkey outtakes? Well, that's what Murphy's work here feels like; just non-stop jibber jabber.

You know the Hollywood drill: take an established or name property, in this case the old 1960s I Spy TV show, package it with whomever is considered hot at the time (Owen Wilson and Murphy), take four monkeys to bang out a script, film it in a mediocre fashion that favors the action instead of the comedy, then shit it out onto movie screens.

If given the option of watching this again, I'd rather do my taxes, and I FUCKING HATE DOING MY TAXES.

ps: two things of note. 1. Gary Cole is pretty much wasted as Wilson's rival, the super spy Carlos (they made him up to look like Steven Seagal, complete with ponytail, but there was no there there) and 2. Casting was messed up. Famke Janssen was too old to play the love interest. Now, don't get me wrong I LOVE me some Famke, always have, but she looked about 10 years older than Owen Wilson. They needed to cast a hot twenty-something. That should have been a no-brainer. Also, what was with the idiot cast as the general? He was fat, stupid and he looked about 40 years old. I know this is a dumb action-comedy, but you don't get to be a two-star general at 40! It's such a simple detail, and it shows you where this movie's head is at (firmly up its ass) when they can't get that right. Don't tell me Charles Napier wasn't available when this fucker was made.

1 comment:

  1. Definitely disagree on the Famke comment! She was really hot in this movie. I thought she and Owen Wilson looked about the same age too.