Monday, June 22, 2009

Projecting your feelings

Because "homage" is the sincerest way to say "ripping off" we present the new feature, Fuck You, Alien! Based on the hilarious blog FU Penguin. He tells cute animals what's what, and we tell aliens the same thing.

"Lights of Zetar" Star Trek alien.

Can you believe this shit? An alien creature made out of what looks like of Christmas tree lights reflected off a pinwheel.

What’s so bad about that, you think to yourself. You see, this light creature, we’ll call it Blinky, feeds off human emotion, like a vampire feeds off blood. (And not one of those pussy Twilight vampires, but a real, skuzzy vampire like in Near Dark.) And when are we more emotionally vulnerable than at work? You think your day is cruising along just fine - there you are, walking down the corridor minding your own business, planning out your morning or maybe thinking about asking that cute astrophysics chick out for coffee - when you suddenly get pulled into a four hour staff meeting that absolutely served no fucking purpose. You leave the conference room steamed as all get out when you run into Blinky the Christmas Light Pinwheel, who feeds off your hate and frustration like one of those big-ass leeches from Rambo: First Blood Part II. And since Blinky needs you to continually feel frustration and anger, his leechifying makes you all loopy so you blow if with the chick from astrophysics, who now thinks you are a major asshole, which makes you even angrier. All the while Blinky is leaning back and laughing at you.

Be warned Blinky, your day is coming soon. All we need is the opportunity to pull out one Christmas light and your reign of terror is over.

Disclaimer: Star Trek is Copyright 2009 and a Registered Trademark of CBS Studios, Inc. No infringement of those rights is implied. Thanks to for the Star Trek screencaps.

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